in her shado/w

[bossymarmalade]

K: Ollie.

O: Darling.

K: Hey. *soft little smile*

O: *wraps his arms around her, pushing his face against her hair and breathing in*

K: *reaches up and strokes the hair on the back of his head* It’ll be okay.

O: Is it really? Did I do the wrong thing, Kate? I feel like I made this happen.

K: Ollie, do you think she’d ever have taken no for an answer?

O: *his arms tighten a little more around her, almost spasmodically, and he swallows so hard she can feel his adam’s apple bobbing*

K: *realises that Ollie’s afraid, and she wraps her arms around him even tighter* She has strange ideas.

O: She shot him. She woulda shot you, if it’d been you. I should never have let her come here.

K: Ollie. Stop blaming yourself.

O: *makes a noise deep in the hollow of his throat, but then says, with obvious effort* …what strange ideas does she have.

K: Cielo. Do you really need to know?



O: I think I do, kinda. *takes her hands in his, leaning back enough so he can look at her, seriously* What did she say to you?

K: She…*winces because it’s not exactly easy stuff to say* She…did what she did to you because she wanted to restore the balance of things. Because she says she taught you to kill, she had to make some good in the world.

O: *rubs his thumbs slowly into her palms* I guess that makes sense.

K: Yeah, if your logic is utterly twisted.

O: *shrugs* She grew up twisted.

K: That doesn’t make what she did any less fucked up!

O: No, no — you’re right. It’s … fucked up. You’re right. *lifts her hand and puts it against the side of his neck, holding it there* He looked god-awful. I’ve seen him look bad before, but this was something else.

K: *is about to say something else about Shado, but instead swallows hard* Yeah. It was ugly. I…he probably didn’t help it by helping me sedate her.

O: I never saw mine. By the time she let me up out of the drug haze, I was healing. Patched up. *moves his fingers, interlinked with hers, to the spot near his heart* I never really realized how close she came to killing me.

K: *makes a soft choking noise before clearing her throat* She said she wasn’t trying to kill him. He…he had armor at least. Slowed it down.

O: *his gaze moves from side to side at some distant point, scanning, before he looks back at Kate, jaw set* She’s delusional at best and murderous at worst. The kind of person who sets death in motion but doesn’t strike the killing blow herself. She /could/ have killed him, just like she could have killed you, if it’d been you. And told herself that it was all in the name of being a good mother.

K: *is about to say something, again, but changes her mind* Yeah. Pretty much. But Bruce…he’ll be okay, Ollie.

O: *has been watching her pretty closely, so he notices the shift* What? What were you gonna say?

K: She can’t just be here for Tak. I think it’s you she wants to see. She has…weird ideas about how things happened between you.

O: *blinks, a corner of his lip lifting* She does?

K: Just from what she said. How she implied it. Like that you weren’t, uh…fuck, Ollie…

O: Oh. Well, I had trouble understanding it myself. I did stay with her after, y’know. For a while. Made things a lot muddier.

K: No, not quite like that. Like you weren’t without blame in what…*clears throat* What she did.

O: *looks blank* …you mean, ‘cause I got hard?

K: That wasn’t exactly how she implied it. I think she has a lot of…really messed up ideas about you and her. *finally just blurts it* She said she was a virgin.

O: *stares at her, his eyebrows slowly furrowing; it’s clear that this is news to him*

K: What she said, for whatever that’s worth.

O: I … why would she lie about that, though?
O: I need to sit down.

K: I don’t know if she’s been telling herself a story all these years about it, about how things happened. *gently tugs him over to the sofa*

O: *flops down on it, dragging Kate down with him; he moves her onto him, against him, clinging to her* That’s even more fucked up than I thought. Jesus christ.

K: *reaches up, strokes his hair* Talk to me. Talk it out.

O: I dunno. She was always so calm about everything, it never seemed like it was … like I was the first man she’d ever been with. She never mentioned it, that’s for damn sure. I dunno, Kate. It’s hard to think about, especially now. *pulls her in closer* Now I just want it all over with. I’m done giving her the benefit of the doubt. Not after seeing what she did to Bruce.

K: She’s got it in her head like you seduced her. Not that she didn’t go willingly.

O: *haltingly* Seduced her.

K: I don’t know. I can’t fucking tell what she meant, but she set it up going that way.

O: Okay. *takes a breath* Okay, good. Did she say anything else weird? About Tak, about me being his father, anything like that?

K: Tak’s got an implant. So does she. So she can track him. It’s how she knew he was out, though not where he was or how.

O: Hrm. We’ll have to dig that outta him.

K: She said…she said she…she said everything was terrible all around her, all dark. And she was empty and needed light, to give that to her child, from someone like you. I can’t…I can’t even tell you all this, Ollie, it’s so wrong.

O: *pats her tummy reassuringly* No, it’s all right. I need to know so if it’s stuff she’s brought Tak up on, I’ll know what I’m up against. The things I’ll need to debunk. *kisses her cheek gently* Honestly. It’s all right. She said something kinda like that to Dinah, way back when. About wanting a piece of me, so she took it. *lingers with his cheek pressed against hers*

K: I told her that we knew darkness, and that we knew how you were. Saw the good of you. But that that was something she couldn’t go ahead and steal.

O: *strokes Kate’s hair, pressing a tendril of it between his fingers, wrapping it around* You’re not all darkness. Neither of you are. You’ve both got more light in you than you know.

K: I know, but it’s true, that’s what we get from you, cielo.

O: *cupping her face* It’s an even trade. *he holds her for a while, then stretches out on the sofa, pulling her to lie on top of him* What’re we even gonna do with her. She’s not looney toons enough to stick in Arkham.

K: *shakes her head* I don’t know. I think she’s gonna be pretty mad when she finds out about you and Tak.

O: *grunts* I dunno what’s gonna happen /there/, either. Haven’t even had much of a chance to conversate with the kid.

K: Mia seems to get along with him okay.

O: Mia’s taking point.

K: You need to talk to him, Ollie. And god, don’t call him ‘kid’.

O: Hey, who’s got more experience with ornery teenagers here, me or you?

K: *lifts an eyebrow at him* Yeah, well, you end up sounding less like Han Solo and more like a crochety old man.

O: *snorts* Kids love that. Makes ‘em feel superior. Besides, I /am/ a crochety old man.

K: Ollie, kids do not, and you are NOT an old man. *shakes her head* I need a drink. That woman makes me need to get absolutely shitfaced.

O: *firmly* Look, you deal with the younger set in your way and I’ll deal with ‘em in mine. And a gimlet would be great, thanks.

K: I’m just saying, don’t alienate him after all of the crap we’ve all gone through to get him. *pushes up off his chest, fingers lingering for a moment before she moves to stand, goes to make drinks*

O: Trust me, after two other boys of wildly varying temperament, I’ve got it down now. There’s nothing Tak can do that’ll throw me.

K: *over her shoulder* Oh, RIGHT. Consider ye where his genes come from, and who raised him, then come back and tell me that.

O: We’ll see how it goes. *sits up, hanging his elbows over the back of the sofa to watch her* And maybe I’ll let him spends some time with you, Miss Madam, and see what miracles /you/ can work with’im.

K: I don’t say I can work miracles. *sticks her tongue out at him* Just that you’re not the Teenage Boy Whisperer.

O: Oh sure, sure — all this advice, Ollie do this, Ollie don’t do that, but you backpedal out of it fast enough when it’s /your/ ass on the line! *sticks his tongue back out at her, grinning*

K: I do NOT. *flips him off, but she’s smirking* Fine, no more advice, see what I care. *comes back over with drinks—gimlet for him, margarita for her—and flops onto the sofa*

O: *hums in pleasure at the drink, taking a gulp at first and then drinking more sanely* It’s gonna be all right. It’s true, you’re right. It’s all gonna work out okay. Bruce’ll be fine, she didn’t manage to hurt you, she— *pulls up short, looking at Kate* She /didn’t/ hurt you, did she?

K: Physically? No.

O: *more quietly* But otherwise?

K: She said things that make me feel sick.

O: Honey. *wraps his hand over her ankle, squeezing* I’m so sorry.

K: Oh god, Ollie, you don’t need to be sorry. It’s just, terrible stories about what she did to you, when I knew what had happened, have SEEN what the result of the reality is…
K: She’ll never believe she hurt you.

O: *swirls his drink around, looking down at it* It’s okay. I don’t need her to.

K: I feel like I do and it drives me crazy that I can’t. Like I want to hold a goddamn knife to her throat.

O: Well. That’s because you love me. *he stills his hand but leaves it on her ankle, the look in his eyes soft and warm* And that’s the kind of way that you and B show love sometimes.

K: *curls her toes and wrinkles up her face, frustrated, but not knowing what to do* I couldn’t say it to her face.

O: Howcome, sweetie?

K: It didn’t feel right for me to accuse her. Like that would betray you.
K: Because it’s your decision.

O: Mmm— *finishes off his drink and puts down the glass, turning towards her on the sofa earnestly* Katie, you can do and say anything to her that you want. It wouldn’t be a betrayal, honest. I’d never see it that way because you’re my /wife/, you’re the person who matters to me. Even if you felt it was my decision — which, I mean, maybe, but that doesn’t mean you can’t yell at people who’ve hurt me if you want — there’s no betrayal. Okay?

K: I figured if you had never said it to her, then you had your reasons.

O: *huffs faintly* Yeah, my reason was that I never wanted to deal with it much. That’s the long and short of it.

K: Oh. Well, even so…she probably wouldn’t believe me anyway.

O: *shakes his head* Doesn’t matter. From her end of things, I mean. But if it would make you feel less frustrated, Katie, you tell her whatever the hell you want and don’t worry that I’ll get upset that you’re … I dunno, talking for me, or something. You’re /allowed/ to talk for me when it comes to some things. That I’m not good at talking about for myself, especially.

K: *leans in and brushes a kiss over his lips, faintly boozy but sweet* Okay. Ollie…

O: *closing his eyes a little as he leans into the kiss* Yes, darling?

K: I really, really missed you.