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thejusticelounge2013-06-18 11:23 am
bossymarmalade) wrote in thejusticelounge2013-06-18 11:23 am
Entry tags:
sauce for the goose
It was a few days after their initial meeting, and Kyle was expecting Bette over at Hal’s home in Coast City. He’d made sure to set the little stage in studio up (utilizing Hal’s enjoyment of being moved about like a living doll) with the best lighting and background for a light-skinned person, as well as providing a little bench for Bette to perch on while he took his sketches.
Everything was pristine. Kyle wanted to alleviate Bette’s nervousness as much as possible, perhaps distill it into more excitement for her commission.
“Let’s see…easel and newsprint, conte and rags. Lots and lots of ice water and those tiny little cakes that I’m fairly sure all ladies like. From Goldberg’s Bakery, naturally. Ample cushions, a blanket, a robe in case she forgot one, slippers, 74-degree room…I think that’s it!”
“You’ll be fine.” Hal assured as he put on his jacket. He kissed Kyle on the temple and smiled. “Have a good day at work, honey.”
“You too, nene,” Kyle said absently, but he briefly held Hal’s hand before the pilot left for work.
The new zeta pad was installed on the house, and Kyle heard the house system announce Bette’s arrival. In a spontaneous moment, Kyle realized maybe he could give Bette some further ease about her eventual nudity….
…he bounded up to the roof to greet Bette, half-naked. The cool ocean wind hit his bare chest and arms, and goosebumped it before the green light shield thinly slid over him. Kyle spread his arms out to greet Bette, grinning widely.
“Hola chica! Perfect timing.”
“Hola, Kyle!” she echoed, stepping off the Zeta pad. When she realized Kyle wasn’t wearing a flesh tone T-shirt, however, she did a quick double-take. She already knew his Green Lantern uniform left little to the imagination when it came to his muscle definition, then again, so did John’s and Hal’s - for some reason the most muscularly-defined of the bunch covered his up with a vest. Still, a uniform wasn’t skin, and Kyle’s body was certainly candy for the eye. Ah well, an alternate universe perhaps, or another lifetime. Besides, she couldn’t be happier with anyone else right now, especially after what Dick had said last night, in the Arboretum.
Her smile widened, partly to cover her lingering eyes -only lingering a second- with her genuine happiness at seeing her friend. She’d gotten a solid head-start on her 50’s-era makeup, particularly the red lipstick and artfully-applied black liner and mascara over her eyes; saving the pink rouge for when she was sure what lighting she was dealing with.
The house was huge and impressive, not unlike others she’d seen in accompanying her parents in their social circles, and the ocean view they had was simply to die for. So much space to move and work and live in, quite the opposite of Kate’s place in Gotham. This was surely the kind of place she wanted to retire in, someday. The again, for all she knew, retirement might include a tall, dark, and handsome acrobat from Bludhaven, in which case a bachelor suite in a rundown apartment building would be good enough, as long as Dick was there to share it with.
“Wow, look at this!” she gushed when he showed her the studio. Not only was it clearly a fully professional studio workplace and not just a corner of an apartment, but he’d thought of everything, the sweetheart, right down to robe and slippers. “And nice and cozy warm in here too! No wonder you work with your shirt off, it makes perfect sense…”
And belatedly, she realized just how accommodating for her he was being, and the real reason he was stripped to the waist. She couldn’t think of any photographer she’d known back when she’d briefly done modeling and pageants as a teen that found the lights so hot they had to take their shirts off. She gave him a long, grateful look. “Thank you, Kyle. This is wonderful, I really appreciate it.”
“De nada! I had Kate in here a few weeks ago and she complained up a storm, so I took her requests into consideration for you.” He grinned fondly, remembering. ”Kate’s got no problem making herself comfortable. I figured you might still have, ah, compunctions to be polite, since we don’t know each other too well. But as the saying goes: mi casa es su casa. If you need anything, don’t be afraid to ask, okay?”
He stretched out his arms and slapped them to his sides, feeling a little self-conscious. Not from the situation so much as the house itself. It wasn’t his place after all; and he was constantly reminding himself of this. People’s impressions of the home were all for Hal, not him. Yet ironically, he was the one who invited everyone over, whether it was for artistic reasons or just to hang out.
It was an odd situation, one not lost on Kyle, and one he thought about a lot. Kyle tied a lot of his feelings about the house to an analogy of his relationship with Hal. Rather conceptual a connection, perhaps; but Kyle enjoyed introspection.
“So! Um, we pretty much got a whole day, right? You can take your time, get comfortable. Finish your make up or your hair, if you need to, there’s a washroom over there. You look great, by the way. Totally 50’s, it’s super neat.” Kyle sucked in his bottom lip, teething it as he considered what to say. “And we can start with some warm-up things, y’know? If you didn’t wanna jump straight into nakedness?” He grinned. “Just so you can get a feel for it. Thirty-second sketches, you can be in the robe or whatever you wanna do.”
“That sounds good, sure. That might help us with settling on a pose, too, right?” she suggested. She’d gone over so many Googled pictures of B-52 bomber nose art, Vargas girls, pin-up calendars and such, and she still couldn’t settle on a favourite pose. For that, she decided, she’d look to the artist’s opinion for help.
Bette excused herself to finish her makeup, and left her hair in its ponytail (which was still very 50’s) though she lightly styled the bangs a little with her fingers and some gel. She took the opportunity to change out of her clothes while she was in there, being brave and leaving the swimsuit in her bag. When she emerged, she wore nothing but the robe, slippers, and a smile of confidence.
She chose to take him up on his offer to work up to the disrobing part, going with what was familiar to her: regular modelling. All she had to do was be sure to hold poses for thirty seconds, not three. She perched herself on the bench he’d set out for her, kicked off the slippers and simply crossed her legs, letting the robe part naturally and drape over her thighs. “If you don’t mind doing all those sketches, I think that sounds like a fun warm up!”
“So, Kyle, have you aspired to be an artist all your life?”
“Yeah I got all your ideas for poses, thanks chica,” Kyle called out to her as she changed. He grinned to himself, clipping some newsprint up on his easel and sketching out the waxy part of his conte as he waited for her. She was definitely excited by this concept, which excited Kyle as well. Nothing like seeing someone eager to engage in something he loved, to spark the old inspiration and creativity.
Seeing her emerge in her bathroom, Kyle made a noise of approval so she would feel encouraged for foregoing anything under the robe. He promptly took a couple steps back, unbuckling his belt and undoing his jeans. Kyle kicked them off to the side, now clad only in his skivvies. He shared a grin with her and set a timer on his ring. “We’ll go for about, ohhhhhh I dunno. Ten or fifteen sketches. Every time my ring squawks, just change to a new position, ‘kay?”
He started sketching, using fast broad strokes and looking more at her than at his paper. The ring squawked twice (like a raven) and Kyle flipped the newsprint as Bette swayed into a new pose.
“Ahhhhh I dunno! My mom always encouraged me, so I guess it just became a habit. I went to art college for a couple semesters but dropped out.” The ring squawked again and Kyle chuckled softly, waiting for her to re-pose. “That’s when I got this piece a’ jewelry and so, I guess that was that. I tried graphic design for a while, but it sucked. So….graphical.”
He was quiet for a bit as he got the last few strokes in, until his ring squawked again. Each new pose, Kyle was getting faster, getting more of her rendered on print. “You’re still doing the school thing, right? Sports…medicine? I think you told me that first time we met…”
Bette was switching to a new pose as he asked; this time she sat on the bench with back to him, her ankles cross, and let the robe slip off one shoulder. She turned her chin over that naked shoulder to look at him, and kept it there, picturing how she hoped it looked from his perspective: a swan neck under the ponytail, a defined physique but still rounded and feminine in outline, and a come-hither gaze.
“Well, the field I want to get into is sports medicine, as a fallback when it’s time for me to give up pro tennis, but technically speaking it’s a masters in physiotherapy that I’m taking at Gotham U. When I’m done I’ll be a certified physiotherapist then and I can help athletes with sports injury prevention and recovery.”
She winked, “Maybe it’ll come in handy for other Leaguers, too, hmm? I mean, don’t get me wrong, the Medbay staff are great, but they’ll never fully understand what we go through physically on some of our missions.”
The raven chirp sounded again from Kyle’s ring, and she paused, trying to think of her next pose. She was feeling more confident now about posing nude for him, plus she was eager to see his work. “Are you warmed up now? I’m feeling pretty good about this…” Her hands dropped to the knot of the belt tying the robe closed.
She worried her lip a little and then stopped, remembering her make-up and how long it had taken her to get the perfect ‘archer’s bow’ with her lipstick. “I was wondering…if I take off this robe, are you losing the underwear? I mean, do what’s comfortable for you, Kyle, but I don’t want you to feel obligated to strip for my sake.”
“Heyyyy that’s neat,” He rested an arm over his easel to lean against and smile at her. ”You’re only what - twenty-five right? And you’ve done and won contests, competitions, heroing and now career development. And you’re still ticking along, motivated as ever. That’s incredible.” He broke out into a cheery grin. ”Most I ever accomplished by twenty-five was trying not to get myself killed.”
He was about to compare her to another Bat-like blonde girl he knew, who seemed to balance 12 things at any given time, suffered tragedy and still managed to joyfully keep going, but…honestly Kyle wasn’t sure how Bat-politics worked between the women. He knew there was something about Batwoman and maybe subsequently Flamebird that created some sort of long-time schism between Kane and Wayne…and Steph’s history always seemed that of the outsider trying to get accepted by Bruce, unlike the other Robins…and then there was Cass. Kyle decided to keep mum about it. He liked them all anyway, so it wasn’t a big deal to him, their inner/outer politics with each other.
“Actually, I’m usually more Adam around the house than I am clothed,” Kyle said brightly. He’d realized a long time ago that there was no point trying to explain the concept of nakedness-nonchalance to people who were NOT Green Lanterns. They never understood that being a Green Lantern had to do with not caring about nudity (for him anyway; given the context of his own personal life), and Kyle never really knew if they could really comprehend the scope of alien life and what it meant for human sacks of flesh like him. People always thought Kyle just had to feel shy about it; when, really, he simply didn’t.
He laughed, coming around his easel to motion at her reassuringly. “Although I don’t wanna make you laugh and break concentration all the time. My wang can get as enthusiastic as I do, when I get really into my art, you know,” he said confidingly (still grinning), winking to her.
“Oh yeah, just…just flopping itself all over the place, like a hot dog.” He motioned with his hand, a flippy side-to-side movement. “Did I say hot dog? I meant kilbasa.”
She smiled demurely under his praise as she took her time undoing the sash of her robe. “Well, to be fair, I started very early. Not Toddlers in Tiaras young, but I was around ten or eleven when I started doing pageants? It was a hobby that I did into my teens. I was into tennis and loving it by fourteen, and that was around the same time I decided I wanted to fight crime as well, so the physical part was really just an extension of the tennis fitness training I was doing anyway. I killed two birds with one stone. If it weren’t for the crime fighting, I might never have gone pro with tennis, so one really boosted the other. I never even considered a master’s degree until it was clear I had no future with the Titans.”
“It’s funny, all the great plans I had back then didn’t turn out at all the way I expected them to,” she gave him a wry look, “Some of my best strengths are based on my biggest failures. I guess it’s that way with a lot of people, though. You know the saying, that which doesn’t kill you…” She didn’t say this with false cheer or a brave face, but neither was she outwardly sad. Bette was remarkably neutral, for a change, reflecting in calm acceptance of days gone by. Sometimes the memories of rejection and injury still hurt, but not nearly as much as they used to.
She realized she was talking his ear off again, and stopped herself. To hear Kyle talking about getting a hard-on around her while she was posing was probably one of the greatest tests of her not getting flustered she’d had since Kate Spencer had spoken to her about “never letting them see you sweat”. If she could keep it together now, in front of Kyle, while he matched her nudity and started doing the helicopter in front of his easel, she could do anything. Okay, take it in stride, Bette. Joke back, and try not to blush.
“Kielbasa? Personally prefer kosher salami. All-beef. Tasty.”
Are you fucking serious??? You did NOT just compare his penis to something you find tasty…oh G-d, Bette, way to panic. Great, now you’re blushing AND giggling.
“Ahh, so what pose would you like to try first? I think I’m ready to give this a go…” she said as she opened her robe and slipped it off. It felt right to disrobe quickly and without further preamble. She didn’t want to inadvertently tease him. She draped it over the bench, within reach, and sat down again, folding her hands in her lap, eyes riveted on his face…chest…abs…and back up again to his face quickly.
Kyle was about to agree enthusiastically about kosher and halal deli meat quality over regular ones - thank you, Greenwich Village - when he realized suddenly from her blush that poor Bette might under more…heated impressions. The whole situation: two people, totally naked in an art studio; the perfect ‘flirty’ scene…for anyone who wasn’t an artist, that is.
Ayyy dios, I’ve been going about this all wrong! he thought, feeling sympathy for the poor woman as she demurely disrobed. Truth was, he thought Bette was pretty and cute; but a lot like how Steph was pretty and cute, or Mia. Kyle never crossed that line with Steph or Mia - not in his thoughts or otherwise. They were like his relatives, sisters and nieces. He could strip down in front of Steph, say, and not…feel any stirring in the loins. He saw Bette in the same light - sweet, and not particularly sexual beyond her private realm of Dick Grayson. Kyle respected that. And given how utterly devoted to Dick she was, Kyle didn’t think she saw him as anything beyond ‘nice friend’, like a cousin or something. Certainly not ‘attractive friend’.
Kyle realized he was just making this worse for her, and she might be worried he’d spontaneously get turned-on while working! He briefly wondered if she’d ever seen peen or the mechanics thereof; but that was neither here nor there. Good job moron. Braying and bragging about your verga in front of her like a total culobrero. Poor Bette!
There was a reason why he never offered to strip down in front of Kate, when she modeled for him. Because yeah. Being naked in front of Kate would’ve been…very painful to work, heh. Fortunately for Bette, she was firmly lodged as a sweet, pretty client. Unfortunately for Bette, in his eagerness to be friendly, he clearly got overly-friendly.
Kyle drifted back behind his easel, finding his jeans and hopping into them. He left the fly undone, though. No more digging himself in a hole with words. Just a simple action so she understood it was politeness and not modesty.
“You look great,” Kyle assured her. And she did. She was clearly proud of her body, not self-conscious in any way aside from this being her first time posing for art. Given her athleticism and careers-focus on physicality, Kyle figured she was one of those ‘my body is a temple’ types. Then he thought of something and grinned to himself as he refurbished new newsprint and supplies, and she got used to being naked in the room.
“Is the temperature okay? I’m just gonna pose you now, bear with me?” Kyle came back over to the little stage, kneeling in front of her as he started to pose her limbs. Every now and then, Kyle leaned back and squinted, framing her between his fingers. He spoke conversationally.
“Y’know, I was gonna say that it’s obvious you like to take care of yourself, and so you and Dick are a great match since the dude’s like, impeccable. But I then I thought - in our line of heroing work, with the amount of abuse and stress and hardships you Bat-peeps put your body through - it’s kind of an ironic sort of self-conditioning? Ahaha, am I even making sense?”
She felt a little relieved when he put his pants back on, rather than going in the other direction. After all, it wasn’t like they were in a hot tub together with other friends, or skinny dipping, where nudity was just a byproduct of the situation rather than the reason itself. Still, what a sweet man for going to such lengths for her just to make her comfortable!
Then again, he had said he was Adam a lot of the time, so now was he the one uncomfortable? “The temperature’s fine…are you comfortable enough?” She gave a brief nod towards his jeans and as understanding a smile as she could manage. “I’m okay with you in your shorts. But I’m sorry if I…” She took a sort of cleansing breath and relaxed as he posed her. “We’re both fine. No more awkward, I promise. I’m actually having fun, you know. Dick’s going to love this.”
Bette couldn’t help but grin, her enthusiasm quickly returning as they brought up her favorite subject, Dick Grayson. “He is impeccable, isn’t he? He’s always been in great shape, great body strength even when we were in our early teens.” She sighed a bit happily. “I’m surprised he hasn’t modeled for you. You should ask him, especially since he has experience!”
She moved her leg into position as his hand guided her limb, and felt fine just continuing to talk. “It seems like a real contradiction, doesn’t it? We work hard at perfecting our bodies to function as a hero’s should, and then turn around and betray them as a result of doing hero work.” She briefly trailed her fingers over the scar down her front, then put her hand back in the position Kyle wanted it. “It must be nice, having that shield to protect you. Obviously Lanterns can still be hurt, like Guy was, but to be able to fly without worrying about gravity, or being thrown into a brick wall and just shaking it off? That would be a dream come true in Gotham.”
“I’m good - you must’ve acclimatized to Gotham and man; it’s always cold there. The wet kinda cold? Mom used to call it ‘consumption cold’,” he shook his head fondly, feeling that usual bit of sadness inside. It was frustrating, sometimes, to realize that it took a person dying for one to miss them so much.
Kyle carefully swiveled Bette’s forearm, noting (with some aesthetic pleasure) that she was double-jointed, and her elbow popped a bit as she braced her arm. He’d told Hal once that this was - from a personal, not art perspective - the most fun part working with a live model. The ability to pose and bend their limbs, however he wanted. He once managed to acquire a fully articulated Optimus Prime figurine; and child-Kyle used to spend hours moving its joints, right down to each of Prime’s fingers, the slight tilt of its neck, the pivot of an ankle….It was the same with models - very malleable, so many ways to pose and move their limbs about. His own living doll, he’d told Hal. Well, Hal was, anyway. It wasn’t borderline serial-killer psychopathic to think of your lover like a living doll, ah ha ha. Kyle didn’t think that of other people; but it was still fun to pose them, though.
He stood up, going back to the easel to quickly flesh out his prelim sketch. Bette was talking, which meant she was relaxing.
“Oh that’s right, I remember Dick mentioning he did live-modelling, once,” Kyle grinned. “I’ll let you in on a secret though - whatever art teacher hired him? Was probably trying to get his phone number. Most live models are purposely…well, imperfect. For artists, it’s more interesting to draw a model with sags and folds, wrinkles and rolls. Drawing imperfection is tougher than you think! And perfection in art is merely political propaganda.” He winked at her. “Besides - to you, Dick’s perfect enough in real life. That’s a pretty sweet deal for him.”
He took a couple paces back, looking at the art and then at her, realizing the way she motioned at her scar. Everyone in his business had their fair share of scars - Bat-people especially, Kyle always figured. He saw Damian at the beach once and was rather horrified to see the criss-cross of scar tissue on a child’s back. The one Bette referred to looked relatively new. He made a sympathetic noise. ”Looks like you got that result of hero work pretty recently, huh. It’s okay, you can relax from the pose for a bit. Lemme just work on something here and then I’ll get you back in the pose.”
Kyle leaned into his easel, working from brief glances of her to get a little bit of ear detail right. People underestimated how much the correct ear shape can bring recognizeability to a face.
“You’re right…I don’t think Dick could get any more perfect, to me.” She was busting to tell him. Well, tell someone, anyway. Maybe Kyle was an odd choice to confide in first, but then again, she really felt like she could trust him. “I’m certain, I’ve fallen in love with him.”
She relaxed as instructed and touched the foot-long scar again; she didn’t need to look down. “About 16 months ago,” she began. “I made the stupidest mistake in my life and went after one of Batwoman’s rogues in order to prove to her I had what it takes…and maybe to prove it to myself.”
She could re-tell it now without pain, almost as though she could say it by rote, all matter-of-factly. “I bit off way more than I could chew. I underestimated his strength and speed, and one second I was landing punches on him, the next I was split open and left for dead in the snow. After I recovered, I didn’t work with Kate again until after Batman rescued me from Joker.” She inhaled through her nose and squared her shoulders, nodding decidedly with a tight smile. “Lesson learned, and a scar to help me remember it.”
Her dreamy look returned and her thought drifted back to Dick Grayson, and she ventured, “Mind if I ask you something personal, Kyle? Do you feel that that way about Hal, head over heels in love and thrilled with every second of it?”
Kyle listened as he sketched her quickly, but taking time to concentrate on a couple details. When she talked about this memory, her body paused; she moved slower and more languidly, as if physically recalling the event as well. It was interesting in and of itself to see the way her physicality reacted to her recollection, and it was also helpful for him to fill her figure out as she remained lost in her thoughts. Candid and un-posed. Kyle loved candid, from both a personal and artistic point.
She tightened up as she concluded, but Kyle got what he needed and he was very satisfied. He nodded at her seriously, rubbing the conte dust off on his jeans front. ”Yikes. That sounds like a vigilante doozy, Flamebird,” Kyle said, fetching them both another drink as well as his Polariod camera. He came and sat by her, pulling the robe up over her shoulders.
“I think I got what I needed. And hey - I’m glad you’re here and alive to tell the tale. And that you seem all the better for it, in a way? I watched this documentary on happiness the other day - it said sometimes, it takes tragedy and trauma to make people come out even more happy than before.” He cracked open his bottle and took a few gulps, looking over at her. “Neat, right? I hope it turned out that way for you…and especially with this news about Dick, hey? How cool is that? You sound over the moon about it.”
He stood up, motioning for her to mug for the camera while he snapped some Polariods of her done-up face for later reference. Her question threw him off guard, but not in a bad way. Most people didn’t really talk to him about his relationship - and for a while that was okay. Kyle really only talked to Kate. And Steph liked to ask questions, but Kyle suspected that she did because - like him - she wanted to deflect questions about her and Jason. Kyle had eagerly offered to talk to 2012Guy and Dick about it, when they’d visited; but they seemed more interested in Oliver Queen’s love life.
Kyle had recently promised himself he’d be more vocal about his feelings for another man. For Hal. It wasn’t going to be easy, but Bette was definitely an easy person to talk to.
He exhaled loudly, pulling out another photo and waving it as he thought. “Oh! I…uh…I guess?” He grinned - her sweet and dreamy expression was infectious - and nudged her ankle with his toe. “Care to elaborate what you mean, lady-lovebird?”
At first she wasn’t sure he was listening, but he proved her wrong when he spoke again. He must have been really focused on whatever he was sketching, even though she wasn’t posed at the time. She longed to look, but knew better than to ask.
“You guess?” she grinned wider, and nudged his shoulder with her own. “I could elaborate, but I think it’s probably different for everyone. Besides, I asked you first. You know I could talk your ear off about how Dick makes me feel, so you better go first, or you won’t get a word in edgewise!”
She wriggled her feet into the slippers and brought her water bottle to her lips, less worried now about smudging her lipstick. “Do you think about him all the time, for instance - not just suggestively, but like…what he’s doing at this very moment wherever he is, or what he might like the most for dinner, or where the two of you will be a year from now? When you get good news, is he the first person you want to tell? When you’re sad, is he the first person you think on that could make you smile again? Do you feel like your face is lighting up when you see his face for the first time, even if it’s only been a day since you were last together? That sort of thing…”
Kyle grinned, laying back on the little stage, his hands clasped behind his head. He really just grinned at the high ceiling for a while. He had never actually put his feelings into vocal words - just thoughts in his head, or thoughts he shared with Hal. It was all really novel, so he took his time thinking about how to answer.
He did like hearing her questions though. They indicated further insight about how Bette felt about Dick, and it was pretty darn sweet. In a way and for a moment, it almost made Kyle feel a little sad. He liked when a woman felt that way about him - all the things Bette was asking and describing. He missed that…the affectionate feminine voice and those sweet, mega-romantic thoughts. Hell; even Jenny got kind of sappy every now and then, when Kyle wasn’t himself being a total sap.
But he was really digressing now. He looked up at her and exhaled loudly again, still grinning. “Ahhh! Well I do think about him a lot. I like to say it’s the collector in me. See - when I was a kid, it was all comicbooks and robots and figurines. Now, it’s…collecting Hal. He’s just one guy, but there’s so much to…to procure, so I can get the full set. I want the complete Hal, deluxe extended special limited edition. If that makes sense? Were you into Pokemon? Gotta catch ‘em all, sabes.”
He considered Bette and Dick, and then tilted his head to look at her. “What about you? Ever related your feelings for Dick to like…a sport? Eye on the prize?” He laughed self-consciously and scratched his bare stomach. ”Gah, I sound like an asshole, don’t I; I don’t wanna trivialize your feelings by comparing them to a game. Lo siento, chica.”
“It kind of makes sense; like an obsession, but in every positive connotation of the word. You want more and more of him because you just can’t get enough? I think sometimes I feel that for Dick, too. We’ll have had a great time together, and we’ll be apart no more than a few hours and I’ll realize I’m already longing to see him again, because it simply feels so great when I do.”
Her smile faded a little as her thoughts drifted to the past once more. “No, you’re not that…and don’t worry, you can’t truly trivialize my feelings, they’re far too strong for that,” she smiled at him, patting his knee reassuringly. She stretched her legs out in front of her and pointed her toes as she held them there, locking her knees. “The truth is, I used to, years ago, think of winning Dick like winning anything else. It’s what made me so determined, and what made my failure feel so bitter. Other girls managed to gain his interest, but I couldn’t. I pulled every trick to try to impress him, or get close to him, but of course that only seemed to drive him away even more. Looking back, it was pretty unprofessional, and no one on the team could take me seriously as a crime fighter, except Gar Logan. It all worked out for the best in the end, though. I got serious, and Dick even admitted to me recently that he actually was interested back then; he just couldn’t show it because he didn’t want to distract me from trying to improve myself and get serious about the job.”
She lowered her feet to the floor again and gave a little shrug under the robe, followed by a smile that reflected her usual happiness with the world now, in the present day. “And now…it’s not so much a sport or a prize, as a…a lifestyle? Dick occupies this space that sort of represents what’s been missing in my life, after faith, family, career, there was still an empty part. It’s gotten hard to imagine him not there, making my life feel…fulfilled.” She duck her head a bit and looked demure for a moment, “That…kind of sounds a little stupid when I say it aloud, but it’s how I really feel.”
Kyle’s smile faltered a bit. He felt anxiety creeping in, but he reminded himself that what Bette thought was entirely positive. Kyle certainly didn’t feel obsessed. At least, not in the way it was defined to him previously: as Kyle being neglectful of everyone and everything else, and completely tunnel vision’d to Hal. His horror of finding out that his closest friends thought of him that way, made Kyle do the complete opposite and push Hal away for a long time. But he had then given up on trying to prove his non-obsession, when he realized he’d never be viewed any other way.
Fortunately, things were different now; and even though he was aware of that and everyone was substantially happier, he knew he still had to personally shake away those disapproving, disappointed ghosts in his machine. It was gonna take a while. Riddikulus.
He suddenly felt silly explaining his feelings for Hal as a comparison to a stupid fucking toy - great explanation of your oh-so complex feely-feelz there, Rayner - but Bette was being very sweet about it regardless of his dumbass analogy. He liked the way she looked at things. He appreciated that she could redefine things for him, even if she didn’t realize it.
It was okay. it was going to be okay. But damn; this was harder than he thought, getting all of this out. He was silently grateful to Bette for prompting it. Her blend of non-judgemental and lack of history together made it an interesting, good experience.
“So…” Kyle started, gathering his thoughts about what she was saying. “You can smack me if I’m wrong, but…you started in the Flamebird biz because…you had feelings for Dick? I think that’s kinda romantic….buuuuut I can see how it would be sucky for you. Especially if it was somewhat unrequited.” he added sympathetically.
“And I don’t think it’s stupid at all, Bette. Sounds pretty epic, if you ask me.” His eyes widened a bit as his enthusiasm mounted. “I mean what you feel, is like - it’s like love-lifetime-life-love! Of your life! True love, like in movies! I don’t know if I’ve ever been in love that long to any one person…any one person who was still alive,” he amended. ”But it’s like…like, like both you and your feelings got all grown up and realistic, at the same time. Good on you, chica.”
“That’s how it started, yes,” she blushed a little. “I was just a kid, really, with a humongous crush. Most girls had their actor or musician idols, I had the Boy Wonder. She smiled to herself as she reached for her phone, entered an encryption key and showed him an old picture.
That’s us, back when we were in Titans East and West. I even went by the codename Bat-Girl when I started. I changed it later to Flamebird to avoid confusion with Barbara when she started using the name.” She ran a finger over the image of Robin, smiling fondly with the memories, “Hard to believe it’s been a decade…he still has the same dimples when he smiles. And sure, the rejection from him as well as from the Titans was hard to take, even heartbreaking, but it I think it was good for me, in the long run. Kind of like my scar…that which doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger, right?”
She turned her smile on Kyle, “I think you might be the first person other than Dick who sees it that way; true love, not just a childish crush of mine carried into adulthood and Dick obliging it, but something real and new between us, and…like you said, grown up.”
Impulsively she gave him a side-by-side one-armed hug and briefly pressed the side of her face against his shoulder, happy to know someone understood, at long last. The fact that Kyle had previously been the most vocal against their relationship, and had turned his opinion to outright approval now, made that approval all the more significant and touching. “Thank you, Kyle.”
Kyle instinctively reached over and patted her knee (over the terry-cloth robe), a little surprised at her sudden affection, but definitely happy for it. He smiled, admittedly feeling a little emotional, even though he wasn’t sure why. But he didn’t mind; he liked it, in fact. Whatever the feelings overcoming him were, they felt good and comforting.
“De nada…” Kyle said, his voice husky as he felt the need to keep the tone soft. He took hold of Bette’s shoulders, pulling her back to look at her.
“You okay?” he asked with a kind grin. “I feel like I should snap a photo of your face and send it to Dick…give him a good reminder of happy on hand, for whenever he’s feeling sad, hey? Lookat them peepers, aww.” Kyle chucked her gently under the chin. He stood up again, locating his shirt and putting it on. He motioned for her to follow him, as they trotted downstairs to the kitchen, where Kyle located a large container of green grapes for a snack.
“Ah don’t be too hard on the others, maybe it’s just…” Kyle thought about it as he juggled a few grapes and caught one in his mouth. “…it’s just they’ve known you for longer, so…? Ahahah so you’d think they’d be even more accepting! Right?” He laughed. “Silly people. Heh. But anyway, you both love each other, that’s pretty clear. When people see that, how can they protest!”
Kyle figured Bette was referring to her roommate Ms Kane aka Batwoman, and maybe her family. Maybe some of Dick and Bette’s ex-Titans friends? But Kyle wanted to steer clear of Titans-talk.
Everything was pristine. Kyle wanted to alleviate Bette’s nervousness as much as possible, perhaps distill it into more excitement for her commission.
“Let’s see…easel and newsprint, conte and rags. Lots and lots of ice water and those tiny little cakes that I’m fairly sure all ladies like. From Goldberg’s Bakery, naturally. Ample cushions, a blanket, a robe in case she forgot one, slippers, 74-degree room…I think that’s it!”
“You’ll be fine.” Hal assured as he put on his jacket. He kissed Kyle on the temple and smiled. “Have a good day at work, honey.”
“You too, nene,” Kyle said absently, but he briefly held Hal’s hand before the pilot left for work.
The new zeta pad was installed on the house, and Kyle heard the house system announce Bette’s arrival. In a spontaneous moment, Kyle realized maybe he could give Bette some further ease about her eventual nudity….
…he bounded up to the roof to greet Bette, half-naked. The cool ocean wind hit his bare chest and arms, and goosebumped it before the green light shield thinly slid over him. Kyle spread his arms out to greet Bette, grinning widely.
“Hola chica! Perfect timing.”
“Hola, Kyle!” she echoed, stepping off the Zeta pad. When she realized Kyle wasn’t wearing a flesh tone T-shirt, however, she did a quick double-take. She already knew his Green Lantern uniform left little to the imagination when it came to his muscle definition, then again, so did John’s and Hal’s - for some reason the most muscularly-defined of the bunch covered his up with a vest. Still, a uniform wasn’t skin, and Kyle’s body was certainly candy for the eye. Ah well, an alternate universe perhaps, or another lifetime. Besides, she couldn’t be happier with anyone else right now, especially after what Dick had said last night, in the Arboretum.
Her smile widened, partly to cover her lingering eyes -only lingering a second- with her genuine happiness at seeing her friend. She’d gotten a solid head-start on her 50’s-era makeup, particularly the red lipstick and artfully-applied black liner and mascara over her eyes; saving the pink rouge for when she was sure what lighting she was dealing with.
The house was huge and impressive, not unlike others she’d seen in accompanying her parents in their social circles, and the ocean view they had was simply to die for. So much space to move and work and live in, quite the opposite of Kate’s place in Gotham. This was surely the kind of place she wanted to retire in, someday. The again, for all she knew, retirement might include a tall, dark, and handsome acrobat from Bludhaven, in which case a bachelor suite in a rundown apartment building would be good enough, as long as Dick was there to share it with.
“Wow, look at this!” she gushed when he showed her the studio. Not only was it clearly a fully professional studio workplace and not just a corner of an apartment, but he’d thought of everything, the sweetheart, right down to robe and slippers. “And nice and cozy warm in here too! No wonder you work with your shirt off, it makes perfect sense…”
And belatedly, she realized just how accommodating for her he was being, and the real reason he was stripped to the waist. She couldn’t think of any photographer she’d known back when she’d briefly done modeling and pageants as a teen that found the lights so hot they had to take their shirts off. She gave him a long, grateful look. “Thank you, Kyle. This is wonderful, I really appreciate it.”
“De nada! I had Kate in here a few weeks ago and she complained up a storm, so I took her requests into consideration for you.” He grinned fondly, remembering. ”Kate’s got no problem making herself comfortable. I figured you might still have, ah, compunctions to be polite, since we don’t know each other too well. But as the saying goes: mi casa es su casa. If you need anything, don’t be afraid to ask, okay?”
He stretched out his arms and slapped them to his sides, feeling a little self-conscious. Not from the situation so much as the house itself. It wasn’t his place after all; and he was constantly reminding himself of this. People’s impressions of the home were all for Hal, not him. Yet ironically, he was the one who invited everyone over, whether it was for artistic reasons or just to hang out.
It was an odd situation, one not lost on Kyle, and one he thought about a lot. Kyle tied a lot of his feelings about the house to an analogy of his relationship with Hal. Rather conceptual a connection, perhaps; but Kyle enjoyed introspection.
“So! Um, we pretty much got a whole day, right? You can take your time, get comfortable. Finish your make up or your hair, if you need to, there’s a washroom over there. You look great, by the way. Totally 50’s, it’s super neat.” Kyle sucked in his bottom lip, teething it as he considered what to say. “And we can start with some warm-up things, y’know? If you didn’t wanna jump straight into nakedness?” He grinned. “Just so you can get a feel for it. Thirty-second sketches, you can be in the robe or whatever you wanna do.”
“That sounds good, sure. That might help us with settling on a pose, too, right?” she suggested. She’d gone over so many Googled pictures of B-52 bomber nose art, Vargas girls, pin-up calendars and such, and she still couldn’t settle on a favourite pose. For that, she decided, she’d look to the artist’s opinion for help.
Bette excused herself to finish her makeup, and left her hair in its ponytail (which was still very 50’s) though she lightly styled the bangs a little with her fingers and some gel. She took the opportunity to change out of her clothes while she was in there, being brave and leaving the swimsuit in her bag. When she emerged, she wore nothing but the robe, slippers, and a smile of confidence.
She chose to take him up on his offer to work up to the disrobing part, going with what was familiar to her: regular modelling. All she had to do was be sure to hold poses for thirty seconds, not three. She perched herself on the bench he’d set out for her, kicked off the slippers and simply crossed her legs, letting the robe part naturally and drape over her thighs. “If you don’t mind doing all those sketches, I think that sounds like a fun warm up!”
“So, Kyle, have you aspired to be an artist all your life?”
“Yeah I got all your ideas for poses, thanks chica,” Kyle called out to her as she changed. He grinned to himself, clipping some newsprint up on his easel and sketching out the waxy part of his conte as he waited for her. She was definitely excited by this concept, which excited Kyle as well. Nothing like seeing someone eager to engage in something he loved, to spark the old inspiration and creativity.
Seeing her emerge in her bathroom, Kyle made a noise of approval so she would feel encouraged for foregoing anything under the robe. He promptly took a couple steps back, unbuckling his belt and undoing his jeans. Kyle kicked them off to the side, now clad only in his skivvies. He shared a grin with her and set a timer on his ring. “We’ll go for about, ohhhhhh I dunno. Ten or fifteen sketches. Every time my ring squawks, just change to a new position, ‘kay?”
He started sketching, using fast broad strokes and looking more at her than at his paper. The ring squawked twice (like a raven) and Kyle flipped the newsprint as Bette swayed into a new pose.
“Ahhhhh I dunno! My mom always encouraged me, so I guess it just became a habit. I went to art college for a couple semesters but dropped out.” The ring squawked again and Kyle chuckled softly, waiting for her to re-pose. “That’s when I got this piece a’ jewelry and so, I guess that was that. I tried graphic design for a while, but it sucked. So….graphical.”
He was quiet for a bit as he got the last few strokes in, until his ring squawked again. Each new pose, Kyle was getting faster, getting more of her rendered on print. “You’re still doing the school thing, right? Sports…medicine? I think you told me that first time we met…”
Bette was switching to a new pose as he asked; this time she sat on the bench with back to him, her ankles cross, and let the robe slip off one shoulder. She turned her chin over that naked shoulder to look at him, and kept it there, picturing how she hoped it looked from his perspective: a swan neck under the ponytail, a defined physique but still rounded and feminine in outline, and a come-hither gaze.
“Well, the field I want to get into is sports medicine, as a fallback when it’s time for me to give up pro tennis, but technically speaking it’s a masters in physiotherapy that I’m taking at Gotham U. When I’m done I’ll be a certified physiotherapist then and I can help athletes with sports injury prevention and recovery.”
She winked, “Maybe it’ll come in handy for other Leaguers, too, hmm? I mean, don’t get me wrong, the Medbay staff are great, but they’ll never fully understand what we go through physically on some of our missions.”
The raven chirp sounded again from Kyle’s ring, and she paused, trying to think of her next pose. She was feeling more confident now about posing nude for him, plus she was eager to see his work. “Are you warmed up now? I’m feeling pretty good about this…” Her hands dropped to the knot of the belt tying the robe closed.
She worried her lip a little and then stopped, remembering her make-up and how long it had taken her to get the perfect ‘archer’s bow’ with her lipstick. “I was wondering…if I take off this robe, are you losing the underwear? I mean, do what’s comfortable for you, Kyle, but I don’t want you to feel obligated to strip for my sake.”
“Heyyyy that’s neat,” He rested an arm over his easel to lean against and smile at her. ”You’re only what - twenty-five right? And you’ve done and won contests, competitions, heroing and now career development. And you’re still ticking along, motivated as ever. That’s incredible.” He broke out into a cheery grin. ”Most I ever accomplished by twenty-five was trying not to get myself killed.”
He was about to compare her to another Bat-like blonde girl he knew, who seemed to balance 12 things at any given time, suffered tragedy and still managed to joyfully keep going, but…honestly Kyle wasn’t sure how Bat-politics worked between the women. He knew there was something about Batwoman and maybe subsequently Flamebird that created some sort of long-time schism between Kane and Wayne…and Steph’s history always seemed that of the outsider trying to get accepted by Bruce, unlike the other Robins…and then there was Cass. Kyle decided to keep mum about it. He liked them all anyway, so it wasn’t a big deal to him, their inner/outer politics with each other.
“Actually, I’m usually more Adam around the house than I am clothed,” Kyle said brightly. He’d realized a long time ago that there was no point trying to explain the concept of nakedness-nonchalance to people who were NOT Green Lanterns. They never understood that being a Green Lantern had to do with not caring about nudity (for him anyway; given the context of his own personal life), and Kyle never really knew if they could really comprehend the scope of alien life and what it meant for human sacks of flesh like him. People always thought Kyle just had to feel shy about it; when, really, he simply didn’t.
He laughed, coming around his easel to motion at her reassuringly. “Although I don’t wanna make you laugh and break concentration all the time. My wang can get as enthusiastic as I do, when I get really into my art, you know,” he said confidingly (still grinning), winking to her.
“Oh yeah, just…just flopping itself all over the place, like a hot dog.” He motioned with his hand, a flippy side-to-side movement. “Did I say hot dog? I meant kilbasa.”
She smiled demurely under his praise as she took her time undoing the sash of her robe. “Well, to be fair, I started very early. Not Toddlers in Tiaras young, but I was around ten or eleven when I started doing pageants? It was a hobby that I did into my teens. I was into tennis and loving it by fourteen, and that was around the same time I decided I wanted to fight crime as well, so the physical part was really just an extension of the tennis fitness training I was doing anyway. I killed two birds with one stone. If it weren’t for the crime fighting, I might never have gone pro with tennis, so one really boosted the other. I never even considered a master’s degree until it was clear I had no future with the Titans.”
“It’s funny, all the great plans I had back then didn’t turn out at all the way I expected them to,” she gave him a wry look, “Some of my best strengths are based on my biggest failures. I guess it’s that way with a lot of people, though. You know the saying, that which doesn’t kill you…” She didn’t say this with false cheer or a brave face, but neither was she outwardly sad. Bette was remarkably neutral, for a change, reflecting in calm acceptance of days gone by. Sometimes the memories of rejection and injury still hurt, but not nearly as much as they used to.
She realized she was talking his ear off again, and stopped herself. To hear Kyle talking about getting a hard-on around her while she was posing was probably one of the greatest tests of her not getting flustered she’d had since Kate Spencer had spoken to her about “never letting them see you sweat”. If she could keep it together now, in front of Kyle, while he matched her nudity and started doing the helicopter in front of his easel, she could do anything. Okay, take it in stride, Bette. Joke back, and try not to blush.
“Kielbasa? Personally prefer kosher salami. All-beef. Tasty.”
Are you fucking serious??? You did NOT just compare his penis to something you find tasty…oh G-d, Bette, way to panic. Great, now you’re blushing AND giggling.
“Ahh, so what pose would you like to try first? I think I’m ready to give this a go…” she said as she opened her robe and slipped it off. It felt right to disrobe quickly and without further preamble. She didn’t want to inadvertently tease him. She draped it over the bench, within reach, and sat down again, folding her hands in her lap, eyes riveted on his face…chest…abs…and back up again to his face quickly.
Kyle was about to agree enthusiastically about kosher and halal deli meat quality over regular ones - thank you, Greenwich Village - when he realized suddenly from her blush that poor Bette might under more…heated impressions. The whole situation: two people, totally naked in an art studio; the perfect ‘flirty’ scene…for anyone who wasn’t an artist, that is.
Ayyy dios, I’ve been going about this all wrong! he thought, feeling sympathy for the poor woman as she demurely disrobed. Truth was, he thought Bette was pretty and cute; but a lot like how Steph was pretty and cute, or Mia. Kyle never crossed that line with Steph or Mia - not in his thoughts or otherwise. They were like his relatives, sisters and nieces. He could strip down in front of Steph, say, and not…feel any stirring in the loins. He saw Bette in the same light - sweet, and not particularly sexual beyond her private realm of Dick Grayson. Kyle respected that. And given how utterly devoted to Dick she was, Kyle didn’t think she saw him as anything beyond ‘nice friend’, like a cousin or something. Certainly not ‘attractive friend’.
Kyle realized he was just making this worse for her, and she might be worried he’d spontaneously get turned-on while working! He briefly wondered if she’d ever seen peen or the mechanics thereof; but that was neither here nor there. Good job moron. Braying and bragging about your verga in front of her like a total culobrero. Poor Bette!
There was a reason why he never offered to strip down in front of Kate, when she modeled for him. Because yeah. Being naked in front of Kate would’ve been…very painful to work, heh. Fortunately for Bette, she was firmly lodged as a sweet, pretty client. Unfortunately for Bette, in his eagerness to be friendly, he clearly got overly-friendly.
Kyle drifted back behind his easel, finding his jeans and hopping into them. He left the fly undone, though. No more digging himself in a hole with words. Just a simple action so she understood it was politeness and not modesty.
“You look great,” Kyle assured her. And she did. She was clearly proud of her body, not self-conscious in any way aside from this being her first time posing for art. Given her athleticism and careers-focus on physicality, Kyle figured she was one of those ‘my body is a temple’ types. Then he thought of something and grinned to himself as he refurbished new newsprint and supplies, and she got used to being naked in the room.
“Is the temperature okay? I’m just gonna pose you now, bear with me?” Kyle came back over to the little stage, kneeling in front of her as he started to pose her limbs. Every now and then, Kyle leaned back and squinted, framing her between his fingers. He spoke conversationally.
“Y’know, I was gonna say that it’s obvious you like to take care of yourself, and so you and Dick are a great match since the dude’s like, impeccable. But I then I thought - in our line of heroing work, with the amount of abuse and stress and hardships you Bat-peeps put your body through - it’s kind of an ironic sort of self-conditioning? Ahaha, am I even making sense?”
She felt a little relieved when he put his pants back on, rather than going in the other direction. After all, it wasn’t like they were in a hot tub together with other friends, or skinny dipping, where nudity was just a byproduct of the situation rather than the reason itself. Still, what a sweet man for going to such lengths for her just to make her comfortable!
Then again, he had said he was Adam a lot of the time, so now was he the one uncomfortable? “The temperature’s fine…are you comfortable enough?” She gave a brief nod towards his jeans and as understanding a smile as she could manage. “I’m okay with you in your shorts. But I’m sorry if I…” She took a sort of cleansing breath and relaxed as he posed her. “We’re both fine. No more awkward, I promise. I’m actually having fun, you know. Dick’s going to love this.”
Bette couldn’t help but grin, her enthusiasm quickly returning as they brought up her favorite subject, Dick Grayson. “He is impeccable, isn’t he? He’s always been in great shape, great body strength even when we were in our early teens.” She sighed a bit happily. “I’m surprised he hasn’t modeled for you. You should ask him, especially since he has experience!”
She moved her leg into position as his hand guided her limb, and felt fine just continuing to talk. “It seems like a real contradiction, doesn’t it? We work hard at perfecting our bodies to function as a hero’s should, and then turn around and betray them as a result of doing hero work.” She briefly trailed her fingers over the scar down her front, then put her hand back in the position Kyle wanted it. “It must be nice, having that shield to protect you. Obviously Lanterns can still be hurt, like Guy was, but to be able to fly without worrying about gravity, or being thrown into a brick wall and just shaking it off? That would be a dream come true in Gotham.”
“I’m good - you must’ve acclimatized to Gotham and man; it’s always cold there. The wet kinda cold? Mom used to call it ‘consumption cold’,” he shook his head fondly, feeling that usual bit of sadness inside. It was frustrating, sometimes, to realize that it took a person dying for one to miss them so much.
Kyle carefully swiveled Bette’s forearm, noting (with some aesthetic pleasure) that she was double-jointed, and her elbow popped a bit as she braced her arm. He’d told Hal once that this was - from a personal, not art perspective - the most fun part working with a live model. The ability to pose and bend their limbs, however he wanted. He once managed to acquire a fully articulated Optimus Prime figurine; and child-Kyle used to spend hours moving its joints, right down to each of Prime’s fingers, the slight tilt of its neck, the pivot of an ankle….It was the same with models - very malleable, so many ways to pose and move their limbs about. His own living doll, he’d told Hal. Well, Hal was, anyway. It wasn’t borderline serial-killer psychopathic to think of your lover like a living doll, ah ha ha. Kyle didn’t think that of other people; but it was still fun to pose them, though.
He stood up, going back to the easel to quickly flesh out his prelim sketch. Bette was talking, which meant she was relaxing.
“Oh that’s right, I remember Dick mentioning he did live-modelling, once,” Kyle grinned. “I’ll let you in on a secret though - whatever art teacher hired him? Was probably trying to get his phone number. Most live models are purposely…well, imperfect. For artists, it’s more interesting to draw a model with sags and folds, wrinkles and rolls. Drawing imperfection is tougher than you think! And perfection in art is merely political propaganda.” He winked at her. “Besides - to you, Dick’s perfect enough in real life. That’s a pretty sweet deal for him.”
He took a couple paces back, looking at the art and then at her, realizing the way she motioned at her scar. Everyone in his business had their fair share of scars - Bat-people especially, Kyle always figured. He saw Damian at the beach once and was rather horrified to see the criss-cross of scar tissue on a child’s back. The one Bette referred to looked relatively new. He made a sympathetic noise. ”Looks like you got that result of hero work pretty recently, huh. It’s okay, you can relax from the pose for a bit. Lemme just work on something here and then I’ll get you back in the pose.”
Kyle leaned into his easel, working from brief glances of her to get a little bit of ear detail right. People underestimated how much the correct ear shape can bring recognizeability to a face.
“You’re right…I don’t think Dick could get any more perfect, to me.” She was busting to tell him. Well, tell someone, anyway. Maybe Kyle was an odd choice to confide in first, but then again, she really felt like she could trust him. “I’m certain, I’ve fallen in love with him.”
She relaxed as instructed and touched the foot-long scar again; she didn’t need to look down. “About 16 months ago,” she began. “I made the stupidest mistake in my life and went after one of Batwoman’s rogues in order to prove to her I had what it takes…and maybe to prove it to myself.”
She could re-tell it now without pain, almost as though she could say it by rote, all matter-of-factly. “I bit off way more than I could chew. I underestimated his strength and speed, and one second I was landing punches on him, the next I was split open and left for dead in the snow. After I recovered, I didn’t work with Kate again until after Batman rescued me from Joker.” She inhaled through her nose and squared her shoulders, nodding decidedly with a tight smile. “Lesson learned, and a scar to help me remember it.”
Her dreamy look returned and her thought drifted back to Dick Grayson, and she ventured, “Mind if I ask you something personal, Kyle? Do you feel that that way about Hal, head over heels in love and thrilled with every second of it?”
Kyle listened as he sketched her quickly, but taking time to concentrate on a couple details. When she talked about this memory, her body paused; she moved slower and more languidly, as if physically recalling the event as well. It was interesting in and of itself to see the way her physicality reacted to her recollection, and it was also helpful for him to fill her figure out as she remained lost in her thoughts. Candid and un-posed. Kyle loved candid, from both a personal and artistic point.
She tightened up as she concluded, but Kyle got what he needed and he was very satisfied. He nodded at her seriously, rubbing the conte dust off on his jeans front. ”Yikes. That sounds like a vigilante doozy, Flamebird,” Kyle said, fetching them both another drink as well as his Polariod camera. He came and sat by her, pulling the robe up over her shoulders.
“I think I got what I needed. And hey - I’m glad you’re here and alive to tell the tale. And that you seem all the better for it, in a way? I watched this documentary on happiness the other day - it said sometimes, it takes tragedy and trauma to make people come out even more happy than before.” He cracked open his bottle and took a few gulps, looking over at her. “Neat, right? I hope it turned out that way for you…and especially with this news about Dick, hey? How cool is that? You sound over the moon about it.”
He stood up, motioning for her to mug for the camera while he snapped some Polariods of her done-up face for later reference. Her question threw him off guard, but not in a bad way. Most people didn’t really talk to him about his relationship - and for a while that was okay. Kyle really only talked to Kate. And Steph liked to ask questions, but Kyle suspected that she did because - like him - she wanted to deflect questions about her and Jason. Kyle had eagerly offered to talk to 2012Guy and Dick about it, when they’d visited; but they seemed more interested in Oliver Queen’s love life.
Kyle had recently promised himself he’d be more vocal about his feelings for another man. For Hal. It wasn’t going to be easy, but Bette was definitely an easy person to talk to.
He exhaled loudly, pulling out another photo and waving it as he thought. “Oh! I…uh…I guess?” He grinned - her sweet and dreamy expression was infectious - and nudged her ankle with his toe. “Care to elaborate what you mean, lady-lovebird?”
At first she wasn’t sure he was listening, but he proved her wrong when he spoke again. He must have been really focused on whatever he was sketching, even though she wasn’t posed at the time. She longed to look, but knew better than to ask.
“You guess?” she grinned wider, and nudged his shoulder with her own. “I could elaborate, but I think it’s probably different for everyone. Besides, I asked you first. You know I could talk your ear off about how Dick makes me feel, so you better go first, or you won’t get a word in edgewise!”
She wriggled her feet into the slippers and brought her water bottle to her lips, less worried now about smudging her lipstick. “Do you think about him all the time, for instance - not just suggestively, but like…what he’s doing at this very moment wherever he is, or what he might like the most for dinner, or where the two of you will be a year from now? When you get good news, is he the first person you want to tell? When you’re sad, is he the first person you think on that could make you smile again? Do you feel like your face is lighting up when you see his face for the first time, even if it’s only been a day since you were last together? That sort of thing…”
Kyle grinned, laying back on the little stage, his hands clasped behind his head. He really just grinned at the high ceiling for a while. He had never actually put his feelings into vocal words - just thoughts in his head, or thoughts he shared with Hal. It was all really novel, so he took his time thinking about how to answer.
He did like hearing her questions though. They indicated further insight about how Bette felt about Dick, and it was pretty darn sweet. In a way and for a moment, it almost made Kyle feel a little sad. He liked when a woman felt that way about him - all the things Bette was asking and describing. He missed that…the affectionate feminine voice and those sweet, mega-romantic thoughts. Hell; even Jenny got kind of sappy every now and then, when Kyle wasn’t himself being a total sap.
But he was really digressing now. He looked up at her and exhaled loudly again, still grinning. “Ahhh! Well I do think about him a lot. I like to say it’s the collector in me. See - when I was a kid, it was all comicbooks and robots and figurines. Now, it’s…collecting Hal. He’s just one guy, but there’s so much to…to procure, so I can get the full set. I want the complete Hal, deluxe extended special limited edition. If that makes sense? Were you into Pokemon? Gotta catch ‘em all, sabes.”
He considered Bette and Dick, and then tilted his head to look at her. “What about you? Ever related your feelings for Dick to like…a sport? Eye on the prize?” He laughed self-consciously and scratched his bare stomach. ”Gah, I sound like an asshole, don’t I; I don’t wanna trivialize your feelings by comparing them to a game. Lo siento, chica.”
“It kind of makes sense; like an obsession, but in every positive connotation of the word. You want more and more of him because you just can’t get enough? I think sometimes I feel that for Dick, too. We’ll have had a great time together, and we’ll be apart no more than a few hours and I’ll realize I’m already longing to see him again, because it simply feels so great when I do.”
Her smile faded a little as her thoughts drifted to the past once more. “No, you’re not that…and don’t worry, you can’t truly trivialize my feelings, they’re far too strong for that,” she smiled at him, patting his knee reassuringly. She stretched her legs out in front of her and pointed her toes as she held them there, locking her knees. “The truth is, I used to, years ago, think of winning Dick like winning anything else. It’s what made me so determined, and what made my failure feel so bitter. Other girls managed to gain his interest, but I couldn’t. I pulled every trick to try to impress him, or get close to him, but of course that only seemed to drive him away even more. Looking back, it was pretty unprofessional, and no one on the team could take me seriously as a crime fighter, except Gar Logan. It all worked out for the best in the end, though. I got serious, and Dick even admitted to me recently that he actually was interested back then; he just couldn’t show it because he didn’t want to distract me from trying to improve myself and get serious about the job.”
She lowered her feet to the floor again and gave a little shrug under the robe, followed by a smile that reflected her usual happiness with the world now, in the present day. “And now…it’s not so much a sport or a prize, as a…a lifestyle? Dick occupies this space that sort of represents what’s been missing in my life, after faith, family, career, there was still an empty part. It’s gotten hard to imagine him not there, making my life feel…fulfilled.” She duck her head a bit and looked demure for a moment, “That…kind of sounds a little stupid when I say it aloud, but it’s how I really feel.”
Kyle’s smile faltered a bit. He felt anxiety creeping in, but he reminded himself that what Bette thought was entirely positive. Kyle certainly didn’t feel obsessed. At least, not in the way it was defined to him previously: as Kyle being neglectful of everyone and everything else, and completely tunnel vision’d to Hal. His horror of finding out that his closest friends thought of him that way, made Kyle do the complete opposite and push Hal away for a long time. But he had then given up on trying to prove his non-obsession, when he realized he’d never be viewed any other way.
Fortunately, things were different now; and even though he was aware of that and everyone was substantially happier, he knew he still had to personally shake away those disapproving, disappointed ghosts in his machine. It was gonna take a while. Riddikulus.
He suddenly felt silly explaining his feelings for Hal as a comparison to a stupid fucking toy - great explanation of your oh-so complex feely-feelz there, Rayner - but Bette was being very sweet about it regardless of his dumbass analogy. He liked the way she looked at things. He appreciated that she could redefine things for him, even if she didn’t realize it.
It was okay. it was going to be okay. But damn; this was harder than he thought, getting all of this out. He was silently grateful to Bette for prompting it. Her blend of non-judgemental and lack of history together made it an interesting, good experience.
“So…” Kyle started, gathering his thoughts about what she was saying. “You can smack me if I’m wrong, but…you started in the Flamebird biz because…you had feelings for Dick? I think that’s kinda romantic….buuuuut I can see how it would be sucky for you. Especially if it was somewhat unrequited.” he added sympathetically.
“And I don’t think it’s stupid at all, Bette. Sounds pretty epic, if you ask me.” His eyes widened a bit as his enthusiasm mounted. “I mean what you feel, is like - it’s like love-lifetime-life-love! Of your life! True love, like in movies! I don’t know if I’ve ever been in love that long to any one person…any one person who was still alive,” he amended. ”But it’s like…like, like both you and your feelings got all grown up and realistic, at the same time. Good on you, chica.”
“That’s how it started, yes,” she blushed a little. “I was just a kid, really, with a humongous crush. Most girls had their actor or musician idols, I had the Boy Wonder. She smiled to herself as she reached for her phone, entered an encryption key and showed him an old picture.
That’s us, back when we were in Titans East and West. I even went by the codename Bat-Girl when I started. I changed it later to Flamebird to avoid confusion with Barbara when she started using the name.” She ran a finger over the image of Robin, smiling fondly with the memories, “Hard to believe it’s been a decade…he still has the same dimples when he smiles. And sure, the rejection from him as well as from the Titans was hard to take, even heartbreaking, but it I think it was good for me, in the long run. Kind of like my scar…that which doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger, right?”
She turned her smile on Kyle, “I think you might be the first person other than Dick who sees it that way; true love, not just a childish crush of mine carried into adulthood and Dick obliging it, but something real and new between us, and…like you said, grown up.”
Impulsively she gave him a side-by-side one-armed hug and briefly pressed the side of her face against his shoulder, happy to know someone understood, at long last. The fact that Kyle had previously been the most vocal against their relationship, and had turned his opinion to outright approval now, made that approval all the more significant and touching. “Thank you, Kyle.”
Kyle instinctively reached over and patted her knee (over the terry-cloth robe), a little surprised at her sudden affection, but definitely happy for it. He smiled, admittedly feeling a little emotional, even though he wasn’t sure why. But he didn’t mind; he liked it, in fact. Whatever the feelings overcoming him were, they felt good and comforting.
“De nada…” Kyle said, his voice husky as he felt the need to keep the tone soft. He took hold of Bette’s shoulders, pulling her back to look at her.
“You okay?” he asked with a kind grin. “I feel like I should snap a photo of your face and send it to Dick…give him a good reminder of happy on hand, for whenever he’s feeling sad, hey? Lookat them peepers, aww.” Kyle chucked her gently under the chin. He stood up again, locating his shirt and putting it on. He motioned for her to follow him, as they trotted downstairs to the kitchen, where Kyle located a large container of green grapes for a snack.
“Ah don’t be too hard on the others, maybe it’s just…” Kyle thought about it as he juggled a few grapes and caught one in his mouth. “…it’s just they’ve known you for longer, so…? Ahahah so you’d think they’d be even more accepting! Right?” He laughed. “Silly people. Heh. But anyway, you both love each other, that’s pretty clear. When people see that, how can they protest!”
Kyle figured Bette was referring to her roommate Ms Kane aka Batwoman, and maybe her family. Maybe some of Dick and Bette’s ex-Titans friends? But Kyle wanted to steer clear of Titans-talk.