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thejusticelounge2013-06-20 05:28 pm
bossymarmalade) wrote in thejusticelounge2013-06-20 05:28 pm
Entry tags:
downhearted
She sat out on Stephanie’s fire escape, her knees curled up against her chest and her hands between her legs. She was done searching for Cain, finished spending her days wandering around in the slushy streets of Gotham, and most importantly she was done being upset with Steph. Resting her forehead against the window she wondered how best to start things off, there really was no good way to try and apologize for this.
Just dive in. She tapped lightly against the windowpane, holding her breath that Steph would even let her in. “Hey…” she whispered, imagining that the glass vanished and nothing was separating them. She tapped against the glass again, maybe the cats would notice.
She’d been sleeping, curled herself around a pillow because she’d felt cold and blankets didn’t help. Steph dismissed the hollow tapping sound at first as a part of whatever hazy dream she was having, but it continued and she opened her eyes unwillingly, blinking blearily around the room until her eyes settled on the window. Had she not been living with Bats for years, she might have jumped or screamed at someone peering into her window, but it wasn’t that simple.
Steph stood up and ran a hand through her bed head. She opened the window wide stood there, looking back at Cass. She lacked both the drive and the energy to glare or yell or anything else, she just looked her over and, upon and finding she wasn’t physically hurt, whispered back, “Hey.” And she touched Cass’s wrist lightly, trying to coax her inside. She didn’t want to be angry anymore. Steph sat them down on the edge of her bed, not touching, but wanting to.
A smile cracked through her blank expression as Steph’s fingers wrapped around her wrist. She wasn’t mad, or at least she didn’t want to be. “Hey.” Cass nodded back as she was led inside, grateful for the heat. Rubbing her hands together to get the feeling back in her fingers she tried to think over how best to make amends with Stephanie. How do you say sorry?
Bowing her head, she whispered, “I didn’t mean it…I’m sorry.” It would never be enough, but it was a start towards making things better. Reaching out her hand she looked up to Steph, “I’m sorry.”
And that broke Steph’s heart more than a little, because Cass was here and not hurt (physically, at least) and she’d said what Steph would have said a week ago had she known how to track the girl down. She moved her hand back to Cass’s outreached one and laced the fingers. If there was one thing her friend had taught her, touch spoke volumes and bridged the gaps clumsy words created.
She squeezed. “I’m sorry, too. I mean it. I just, I fucked up and I didn’t mean to hurt you either and I’m just really sorry. And whatever you had to do with your dad the past month … That’s your business. I don’t get to judge,” she said, turning sideways to face Cass where they sat. Steph let go and hugged her closely, tightly, like she was afraid she might lose her again because secretly she was. She’d forgotten how much you could just miss someone’s arms around you. “Can we be okay again?”
Cass’s arms looped around Steph on instinct, her body curling against her friend as if she was the only thing holding her together. She buried her head against Steph’s shoulder, “I want to be okay.” with deep breaths her body relaxed against her friend’s, muscles that had been alert for weeks were now slowing down.
She leaned back away from Steph, scrubbing at her face to wipe away the tears that had fallen down her face. Steph had been right about her father, if she hadn’t been so determined, so set that she still understood a man that had shaped her. “You can judge.” she whispered softly, “I didn’t find Cain.”
For reasons she couldn’t quite explain, Steph felt a pang of hurt for Cass. It wasn’t the empathy that surprised her, no, it was that she realized some teeny-tiny-itzy-bitzy (or so she liked to believe) part of her had actually hoped Cass could find her father and confront him. Nonetheless, when she heard the tone of resigned sadness in her friend’s voice at telling her the news, Steph reached a hand out and this time squeezed her knee gently.
“We’re okay. We always will be. And still not judging,” she told Cass with a soft smile, meaning it. If their argument had proved any one thing, it was that despite their different views upon their similar roots, they both shared a little hope that maybe someday they could fix or at least stop their evil daddies. And it was a heartbreaking thing to feel, so it oftentimes went unacknowledged, but when it resurfaced in either of them …
Her friend looked tired. Physically, emotionally, just completely spent, and Steph couldn’t blame her. It had been a hell of a week. She pressed on Cass’s shoulder until she was lying down on her own side of the queen bed. She grabbed a pair of sweats, her Gotham U hoodie, and a pair of bright yellow and black fuzzy socks and gave them to Cass. “Please take off the suit already,” she all but pleaded, climbing under the covers after shutting the window. Steph pressed a kiss to her friend’s forehead. “You did good out there, hon. You’ll get Cain another day. But now? Please just get some sleep. Wouldn’t want you to keel over and be eaten by my cats, huh?” she joked, the two cats in question asleep in a pile of laundry.
She closed her eyes, paying attention to only Steph’s words. There was forgiveness in her voice, and her hand resting on her knee grounded her further in feeling that despite all they had said to one another things were getting better. They would be better. With an exhale she smiled, scrubbing her hands against her hair as if that would erase all the worry she’d had towards patching things up with Steph.
“You don’t have to ask twice…” Cass smiled from her position on the bed, grabbing the hoodie and sweats to prove her point. Slowly, she sat up and changed out of her suit, leaving it beside the laundry basket. She took a moment to give a bit of attention to the snoozing cats, both lazily swiping their paws at her hands. She’d missed Olive. “No snacks for you two.” she teased.
Sliding under the sheets next to Steph, Cass wiggled a bit closer to her friend. She closed her eyes, trying to allow her mind a bit of rest, but one thought still remained. “I don’t want to get Cain. Not like that. He’s not mine anymore.” she whispered, rolling onto her side to face Steph. Resting her hand on her friend’s shoulder, Cass continued, “There’s no next time.” she’d felt now that her defeat had only showed her one thing: she was no longer Cain’s daughter, and she didn’t understand him as she once was able to. “I’m not the only thing Cain wants anymore.”
Steph turned on her side and let her socked feet bump against the other girl’s. She didn’t know what to say to that realization other than, “He’s a fucking idiot, then.” And she’d said it so confidently, without a bit of hesitation. There was no doubt she believed that-believed that anyone who gave up on Cass had to be beyond any and all hope in regards to their IQ.
She smiled softly at the subtle touch of her shoulder. The thing she’d come to respect about Cass was that she never said anything she didn’t mean, and although verbal speech had literally been a second language for her, their was always touch, and her skin spoke volumes cupped against her own. They could be okay again. The hurt could be forgiven. “Whomever else he’s after, we can help them. Nobody should have to deal with him on their own. You never know, maybe you’ll make a new friend and start a really cool assassin-ninja-princess super squad or something. Can I design the t-shirts?” she asked, pulling the quilt up to their chests and slinging an arm casually over Cass’s waist.
Just dive in. She tapped lightly against the windowpane, holding her breath that Steph would even let her in. “Hey…” she whispered, imagining that the glass vanished and nothing was separating them. She tapped against the glass again, maybe the cats would notice.
She’d been sleeping, curled herself around a pillow because she’d felt cold and blankets didn’t help. Steph dismissed the hollow tapping sound at first as a part of whatever hazy dream she was having, but it continued and she opened her eyes unwillingly, blinking blearily around the room until her eyes settled on the window. Had she not been living with Bats for years, she might have jumped or screamed at someone peering into her window, but it wasn’t that simple.
Steph stood up and ran a hand through her bed head. She opened the window wide stood there, looking back at Cass. She lacked both the drive and the energy to glare or yell or anything else, she just looked her over and, upon and finding she wasn’t physically hurt, whispered back, “Hey.” And she touched Cass’s wrist lightly, trying to coax her inside. She didn’t want to be angry anymore. Steph sat them down on the edge of her bed, not touching, but wanting to.
A smile cracked through her blank expression as Steph’s fingers wrapped around her wrist. She wasn’t mad, or at least she didn’t want to be. “Hey.” Cass nodded back as she was led inside, grateful for the heat. Rubbing her hands together to get the feeling back in her fingers she tried to think over how best to make amends with Stephanie. How do you say sorry?
Bowing her head, she whispered, “I didn’t mean it…I’m sorry.” It would never be enough, but it was a start towards making things better. Reaching out her hand she looked up to Steph, “I’m sorry.”
And that broke Steph’s heart more than a little, because Cass was here and not hurt (physically, at least) and she’d said what Steph would have said a week ago had she known how to track the girl down. She moved her hand back to Cass’s outreached one and laced the fingers. If there was one thing her friend had taught her, touch spoke volumes and bridged the gaps clumsy words created.
She squeezed. “I’m sorry, too. I mean it. I just, I fucked up and I didn’t mean to hurt you either and I’m just really sorry. And whatever you had to do with your dad the past month … That’s your business. I don’t get to judge,” she said, turning sideways to face Cass where they sat. Steph let go and hugged her closely, tightly, like she was afraid she might lose her again because secretly she was. She’d forgotten how much you could just miss someone’s arms around you. “Can we be okay again?”
Cass’s arms looped around Steph on instinct, her body curling against her friend as if she was the only thing holding her together. She buried her head against Steph’s shoulder, “I want to be okay.” with deep breaths her body relaxed against her friend’s, muscles that had been alert for weeks were now slowing down.
She leaned back away from Steph, scrubbing at her face to wipe away the tears that had fallen down her face. Steph had been right about her father, if she hadn’t been so determined, so set that she still understood a man that had shaped her. “You can judge.” she whispered softly, “I didn’t find Cain.”
For reasons she couldn’t quite explain, Steph felt a pang of hurt for Cass. It wasn’t the empathy that surprised her, no, it was that she realized some teeny-tiny-itzy-bitzy (or so she liked to believe) part of her had actually hoped Cass could find her father and confront him. Nonetheless, when she heard the tone of resigned sadness in her friend’s voice at telling her the news, Steph reached a hand out and this time squeezed her knee gently.
“We’re okay. We always will be. And still not judging,” she told Cass with a soft smile, meaning it. If their argument had proved any one thing, it was that despite their different views upon their similar roots, they both shared a little hope that maybe someday they could fix or at least stop their evil daddies. And it was a heartbreaking thing to feel, so it oftentimes went unacknowledged, but when it resurfaced in either of them …
Her friend looked tired. Physically, emotionally, just completely spent, and Steph couldn’t blame her. It had been a hell of a week. She pressed on Cass’s shoulder until she was lying down on her own side of the queen bed. She grabbed a pair of sweats, her Gotham U hoodie, and a pair of bright yellow and black fuzzy socks and gave them to Cass. “Please take off the suit already,” she all but pleaded, climbing under the covers after shutting the window. Steph pressed a kiss to her friend’s forehead. “You did good out there, hon. You’ll get Cain another day. But now? Please just get some sleep. Wouldn’t want you to keel over and be eaten by my cats, huh?” she joked, the two cats in question asleep in a pile of laundry.
She closed her eyes, paying attention to only Steph’s words. There was forgiveness in her voice, and her hand resting on her knee grounded her further in feeling that despite all they had said to one another things were getting better. They would be better. With an exhale she smiled, scrubbing her hands against her hair as if that would erase all the worry she’d had towards patching things up with Steph.
“You don’t have to ask twice…” Cass smiled from her position on the bed, grabbing the hoodie and sweats to prove her point. Slowly, she sat up and changed out of her suit, leaving it beside the laundry basket. She took a moment to give a bit of attention to the snoozing cats, both lazily swiping their paws at her hands. She’d missed Olive. “No snacks for you two.” she teased.
Sliding under the sheets next to Steph, Cass wiggled a bit closer to her friend. She closed her eyes, trying to allow her mind a bit of rest, but one thought still remained. “I don’t want to get Cain. Not like that. He’s not mine anymore.” she whispered, rolling onto her side to face Steph. Resting her hand on her friend’s shoulder, Cass continued, “There’s no next time.” she’d felt now that her defeat had only showed her one thing: she was no longer Cain’s daughter, and she didn’t understand him as she once was able to. “I’m not the only thing Cain wants anymore.”
Steph turned on her side and let her socked feet bump against the other girl’s. She didn’t know what to say to that realization other than, “He’s a fucking idiot, then.” And she’d said it so confidently, without a bit of hesitation. There was no doubt she believed that-believed that anyone who gave up on Cass had to be beyond any and all hope in regards to their IQ.
She smiled softly at the subtle touch of her shoulder. The thing she’d come to respect about Cass was that she never said anything she didn’t mean, and although verbal speech had literally been a second language for her, their was always touch, and her skin spoke volumes cupped against her own. They could be okay again. The hurt could be forgiven. “Whomever else he’s after, we can help them. Nobody should have to deal with him on their own. You never know, maybe you’ll make a new friend and start a really cool assassin-ninja-princess super squad or something. Can I design the t-shirts?” she asked, pulling the quilt up to their chests and slinging an arm casually over Cass’s waist.